Regrets Can Be a Good Thing

Here’s a paradigm challenge outside the old box: regrets can be a good thing. Really, now? This goes against the grain of what we have chosen to believe in….”Live with no regrets;” “Life’s too short for regrets;” “Regrets and recriminations only hurt your soul;” and a lot more quotes that deplore feeling sorry for missed opportunities or past mistakes.
Like all things in this world, perhaps anything can be deemed to be either good or bad. It’s just a matter of perspective. Love can make one soar so high but it can also bring one crashing to the ground. Money can help save lives and it can also destroy them. So when regrets come your way, squeeze these lemons and make fantastic lemonade, just as the flippant saying goes. There’s wisdom in it.
Breathe some positivity into the negativity of “I should have...” by canning the wallowing in, the dwelling on, and the mea culpas from regret. True, embarrassment and guilt seem to cling to you like gum on a sole but perhaps it is time to view your regrettable errors from a different angle. And just like time, stress, and your household budget, why not learn to manage regrets?

Regrets as Life Lessons

As life lessons, regrets are valuable resources. Write down your regrets and beside each, enumerate what you can learn from them and what you can do differently. Keep these in a notebook, diary, or even as your online notes, where you can refer to them from time to time. History may repeat itself; but now, you are armed with experience and memory to do things differently next time.

Regrets as Indicators of Your Instincts

If you can feel regret, then you instinctively know you have done something inappropriate. This means your instincts are honed right. Without that sorry feeling, you may not be able to properly realize how much your actions have contributed poorly or have any empathy for the consequences. People who rarely experience regret may also lack the insight on how their actions have led to the damage or deterioration of their situation. In other words, regretful feelings indicate that your social and moral compasses are spot on.
If however you feel regret constantly and over the littlest of things, it is time for a reassessment of your personal rules and standards. Too strict and inflexible, perhaps? Then, time to relax a bit and bend your personal rules to a more pragmatic level.

Regrets as Signals for Change

Regrets are painful but they actually are good kicks-in-the butt that admonish for changes in your attitudes, thinking patterns, and manners of decision-making. As life lessons, regrets should be used to guide you where you did wrong and trigger you to improve your reactions, given similar situations. Our mistakes should also help us realize the consequences of our decisions, whether these be beneficial or damaging.

Regrets as Character Builders

Many times you cannot undo what has been done but you can pick yourself up and move forward, instead of choosing to wallow in your sin. Regrets can strengthen your abilities to focus on what you can control and work around what you can’t.
Training yourself to focus on the controllable rather than dwell miserably on what is past and possibly irreparable makes you stronger with a skill that allows you to make the most of a situation instead of falling headlong into a cycle of shame and self-recrimination. Sure, you grieve but life must go on, just better this time.
Regrets are a good thing. In this journey called life, our errors give us the opportunities to learn and grow. After all, we are in an adventure. The choice is ours to view our existence through the negativity of myopia or through a well-balanced perspective.
Change is not the only constant thing there is in life. Regrets at some point will be its inevitable companion so they are bound to crop up whether you do or don’t do. Nobody is perfect; no one, impervious to mistakes. Just remember for every regret, there is always a silver lining somewhere.
References:

• http://inspirationfeed.com/articles/self-development/regrets-will-eat-your-soul-learn-how-to-let-go/
• http://tinybuddha.com/blog/dealing-with-regret-8-ways-to-benefit-and-move-forward/
• http://alwayswellwithin.com/2013/10/23/benefits-of-regret/